Five Years after Graduation by Paciente Cubillas, Jr

Below is a feature story and was written by my mentor and maternal uncle.

The school year 1969-70 drew to a close with me filled with confidence I would exit through the gates of USC with a diploma of bachelor of science in commerce, accounting major. This, despite days spent at Fuente Osmeña sympathizing with land reform beneficiaries who staged a demonstration for weeks. Never mind if I neither had a class ring made by Suarez nor wore a toga at the graduation ceremonies, for my parents with my aunties and grandparents who managed to send me through college didn’t have money for these non-essentials. Above all, I was engrossed in finding a job, any job. For this reason, I informed my parents in Leyte not to expect me for vacation.

One summer afternoon I learned an employer was at the dean’s office to give an exam and interview fresh graduates. I was surprised there were few applicants but took the exams anyway and was interviewed. But what job was it? The exam heading said it was that of the Philippine Broadcasting Service (PBS) under the Office of the President. The interviewer in his baritone voice told us, examinees, it was for a broadcasting job. Now, what would an ordinary sounding guy like me do in a world of the likes of newscasters Jess Vestil and SD Tecson or commentator Paeng Yabut and Talyux Bacalso or drama talent Inday Nita and Iyo Karpo? These thoughts undermined my confidence.

But who can argue with destiny? I was told to report to the head of station DYMR occupying an obscure building within the compound of the Bureau of Telecommunications at Wireless, Mandawe City as soon as I can. I was to undergo an apprenticeship under the head of the station, Magno Cadungog. I was told I would be paid an allowance of Php 3.00 a day. I was only allowed to give the time four times an hour, read some public service announcements and spin records chosen in advance by my boss. The first time I sat before the mic that would bring my voice to tens, hundreds, or thousands of invisible listeners was a harrowing experience. Making a “buckle or backle” on-air was almost a mortal sin then. Understanding my predicament Magno asked me to practice the station ID on “monitor” meaning off-air until he was satisfied. Then finally on air, “this is PBS, the Philippine Broadcasting service, station DYMR 1410 kilohertz on your radio, broadcasting from Wireless, Mandaue City.” I felt Miss Tan our speech teacher, squeezing the voice out of me and forming my mouth to pronounce the words right. I love that humble lady. Then three months passed without any paycheck coming or news about a promised formal training before full employment. Meantime I was asked by Philippine Airlines to report for work. But no, I insisted on staying on with great hopes of being hired. Providence again intervened. Another apprentice at the PBS head office quit unexpectedly. I was requested to take the first plane available to Manila to take his place in a six months training at the studios of PBS. That sealed my fate for a 12-year career as a broadcaster. In my second year of employment, Martial Law silenced all radio and TV stations and shuttered all newspapers throughout the country. Being a government radio station, it was the only station in the region that was on air disseminating important announcements like presidential decrees and letters of instruction and airing network feeds from Manila. My job as a broadcaster included news gathering, writing, and newscasting. As a cub reporter, I learned from the more experienced newsmen like Maning Satorre and the people of Godo Roperos of the defunct department of public information.

My sign-on assignment was a great challenge for a 21-year-old sleepy head. Neophytes are given the time slots more experienced staff avoid—the sign-on and sign-off slots. Twice my technician partner woke me up at my sleeping quarters when the Pambansang Awit that preceded the sign on spiel was already spinning. I was horrified and barely got to the booth in time to deliver the half-page script. So, I installed a string that went to my room and tied it to my foot. But the tech got wind of the alarm system. He used the back door instead. But this time I woke up on time.

While still working in Cebu, I attempted to join the US Navy upon the wishes of my mother but failed the physical exam. This must-have disappointed her much. This disappointment, however, was more than made up for later by two of my sisters who worked as nurses in Texas. It was in these first few years at DYMR that I met Fe. She lived farther down the road from my work. Her father who worked as a transmitter technician at Telecom had the privilege to house his family within the Telecom compound. Just six months before I was sent to Davao to head the station there, Fe and I tied the knot at the Archbishop’s Palace chapel.

-Paciente “Boy” Cubillas Jr.

My Module 5 Reflection - The Therapeutic Response on Death, Dying, and Grief

                                                                Seasons of Grief

Shall I wither and fall like an autumn leaf,

From this deep sorrow - from this painful grief?

How can I go on or find a way to be strong?

Will I ever again enjoy life's sweet song?

Sometimes a warm memory sheds light in the dark

And eases the pain like the song of a Meadow Lark.

Then it flits away on silent wings and I'm alone;

Hungering for more of the light it had shone.

Shall grief's bitter cold sadness consume me,

Like a winter storm on the vast angry sea?

How can I fill the void and deep desperate need

To replant my heart with hope's lovely seed?

Then I look at a photo of your playful smiling face

And for a moment I escape to a serene happy place;

Remembering the laughter and all you would do,

Cherishing the honest, caring, loving spirit of you.

Shall spring's cheerful flowers bring life anew

And allow me to forget the agony of missing you?

Will spring's burst of new life bring fresh hope

And teach my grieving soul how to cope?

Sometimes I'll read a treasured card you had given me

And each word's special meaning makes me see,

The precious gift of love I was fortunate to receive,

And I realize you'd never want to see me grieve.

Shall summer's warm brilliant sun bring new light,

And free my anguished mind of its terrible plight?

Will its gentle breezes chase grief's dark clouds away,

And show me a clear path towards a better day?

When I visit the grave where you lie in eternal peace,

I know that death and heaven brought you release;

I try to envision your joy on that shore across the sea,

And, until I join you, that'll have to be enough for me.

For all the remaining seasons of my life on earth,

There'll be days I'll miss your merriment and mirth,

And sometimes I'll sadly long for all the yesterdays;

Missing our chats and your gentle understanding ways.

Yet, the lessons of kindness and love you taught me,

And the good things in life you've helped me to see;

Linger as lasting gifts that comfort and will sustain,

Until I journey to that peaceful shore and see you again

-Belinda Stotler (2012)

Source: https://www.familyfriendpoems.com/poem/seasons-of-grief

Back in my Philosophy 101 class, it will seem illogical when you define a term by its opposite. For instance, you cannot define darkness as the opposite of light or vice versa. In the same manner, we cannot define death as the opposite of life. An incident in the Bible reminds me of when Jesus said to his disciples, “There is no greater love than to lay down one’s life for one’s friends”. (John 15:13) But what is death or loss and how does a future HOA therapeutically express in their communication when dealing with clients in their respective workplaces?  Death will be described, as well as the aspects that it entails, and how HOAs will apply the points of learning from this subject.

Parting is such a Sweet Sorrow

 “Parting is such a sweet sorrow, that I shall say good night till it be ‘morrow”.

(Shakespeare, Romeo & Juliet Act II Scene II). This quote describes a parting or a sense of detachment. The figure below will describe what this quote illustrates.

                                        Figure 1 

           Figure 1 illustrates that dying, death, and grief relate to each other. There is a process (dying), event (death), and response (grief). (Tamparo & Lindh, 2019, p. 249) Among the three, the response is the most obvious, and the degree varies significantly to every individual. The future HOAs will be facing clients who may be grieving due to loss: they may be caused by loss of personal possessions having sentimental value due to catastrophes or disasters, loss of familiar environment, loss of significant other (person or pet), and loss of some part of the self. (Tamparo & Lindh, 2019, p. 249-250). Death, therefore, is an event that causes those who directly or indirectly experience it to feel grief as a result of a sense of loss. Age and the stage of development of an individual can be factors that influence grief. My son who is 5 years old thinks that if I grow old, old, old, then I would be dead. He cries of the thought that I might one day die. Men and women express their grief differently, too. Thus, grieving is not the same for everyone in terms of rate and differences in stages. (Tamparo & Lindh, 2019, p. 254)

Silver Linings

          There are no perfect words to say to someone who experiences death or loss. There are, however, concrete therapeutic expressions that HOAs could benefit from once an opportunity presents itself in the future. For instance, it is important to acknowledge the cultural beliefs and values of the client though they may differ from the HOAs’, listen to what is being said and avoid taking things personally, recognize the stage of stress that the client is in to respond appropriately, maintain a sense of controlled emotional involvement, avoid giving false assurances or discussing problems that warrant uncomfortable responses, recognize communication roadblocks and overcome them, refer appropriately the clients to the right person, and lastly honoring and respecting the client’s wishes. (Tamparo & Lindh, 2019, p.261) HOAs may not be able to wave a magic wand and make the feelings of the clients disappear but at least knowing how to make them feel that they are cared for and someone who understands them would make a difference.

Module 5 Link

https://happilyblessedtobestressed.blogspot.com/2021/04/my-module-5-reflection-therapeutic.html  

References

Stotler, B. (2012) Seasons of Grief. Family Friends Poems. https://www.familyfriendpoems.com/poem/seasons-of-grief

Tamparo, C. & Lindh, W. (2019) Therapeutic Communication for Health Care Professionals (4th Edition) [2.5.8484.0] Retrieved from http://texidium.com

 

My Over-all Course Reflection

          Having Communication in Health Care, specifically Therapeutic Communication is very important for us future HOAs because it is the arrow that we shoot in our day-to-day encounters with clients.  We have covered and reflected on varied topics, and each has its illustrations, discussions, and take-aways. However, I would like to highlight two of these.

          First is on multicultural therapeutic response to clients. I wanted to elaborate on the concrete ways in which future HOAs can apply. For example, when interacting with clients of diverse cultural backgrounds, it is important to develop and acquire knowledge of the culture of the clients and try to assess their values, health practices, and expectations. This will be a springboard in dealing with the clients because knowing their cultural background in these aspects, the HOA will have insights on how to interact and communicate with them with understanding and respect.

          The second is on therapeutic response to clients experiencing stress, anxiety, and fear. The understanding, knowledge, and application of this lesson will be beneficial because as a future HOA, I will be facing various clients experiencing different stages of stress. Thereby armed with this knowledge, I would be able to develop the skill in communicating and understanding clients in the stage of stress that they are in.

           I am just grateful for the dynamic and interesting facilitation of our instructor on this course and enriching interaction with my classmates. This course has allowed me to express myself in my thoughts and reflections and related them to the learnings gained from this subject matter. 

My Module 4 Reflection - The Therapeutic Response to Clients with Depression

 

This video is from Ted-Ed Talk on What is depression by Helen M. Farrell (2015)

 There was a song by The Cranberries entitled Wake up and Smell the Coffee. One of the lines says, “I was twenty-four, was insecure, do whatever it takes” incidentally reflected my so-called quarter-life crisis 20 years ago. I did not want to go out of the house and was only interested in doing household chores and play Diablo III until dawn to fall asleep. I was part of the age bracket that had had to deal with life’s many challenges before the prefrontal cortex is fully developed at the age of 25. (Nierenberg, 2016, para. 6)

Understanding what depression is, its implication and importance to increased knowledge on this topic, as well as how future HOAs can therapeutically communicate with clients who are in this situation shall be described and discussed in this paper.

Down and Under

Psychiatrists in the past diagnosed depression using different criteria. However, they used a more comprehensive definition and set of diagnostic criteria from the DSM-5 and ICD-10-CM to reconcile somehow the confusion. Depression, therefore, is described when there is a persistent feeling of sadness and loss of interest. It is considered a mood disorder. (Tamparo & Lindh, 2019, p.192) It can be minor depression that lasts for at least 2 weeks having two symptoms showing or major (clinical) depression which a person could report showing five or more symptoms for the past 2 weeks. There is a full range of signs and symptoms that are also associated with depression specifiers. For instance, a person with a psychotic specifier would show signs and symptoms of depression that are coupled with delusions and hallucinations. (Tamparo & Lindh, 2019, p.193)

 Wake up and Smell the Coffee

Therefore, the implication in the increased knowledge of defining depression would allow future HOAs a more adept therapeutic communication response to clients who are experiencing episodes of this mood disorder. In addition, future HOAs would also have the awareness of their own mood which could be positive or negative when dealing with them. There is, however, a thin line in being involved emotionally or there is a possibility that transference will occur. Communicating therapeutically with clients who have depression would mean understanding the disorder, listening to the clients attentively, encouraging the client to get professional help, and lastly providing community resources. (Tamparo & Lindh, 2019, p.199) The role of the HOA is very vital once the client with depression comes to the premises because their interaction will set the atmosphere of safety, comfort, and mitigate the feeling of being judged. It is important to note that HOAs may not even always have a great day, thus, it is crucial to recognize one’s mental state.  My personal experience of having had experienced depression would allow me to talk with the clients in a more emphatic and professional manner. Wake up and smell the coffee, as The Cranberries would reiterate, could also provide an impetus for future HOAs that nothing is always constant even momentary feelings of sadness and lack of interest in things. We just have to wake up, shut up, and smell the coffee. It may seem like they are very easy steps but for sure they take some courage and effort to do so.

     

 

References

Farrell, H. (2015, December 15) What is Depression. Ted-Ed. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z-IR48Mb3W0

Nierenberg, C. (2016, October 27) 7 Ways to Recognize Depression in 20-Somethings. Live Science. https://www.livescience.com/56602-signs-depression-young-adults.html

Tamparo, C. & Lindh, W. (2019) Therapeutic Communication for Health Care Professionals (4th Edition) [2.5.8484.0] Retrieved from http://texidium.com

 

 

My Module 3 Reflection on Stress and Therapeutic Responses

 Stress is part of life and without stress, life will be monotonous. However, “some are more susceptible to the impact of stress than others”. (Science Daily, 2020, para. 1). It is in this view that stress will be defined and described as well as be given insights as to how it will be dealt with as a future HOA.

Stressed is Desserts spelled backward

          Stress is being in a mental or emotional strain caused by physical, physiological, and psychological stimuli. Written in combined symbols, the Chinese expressed it in two – danger and opportunity. (Tamparo & Lindh, 2019, p. 135) Stress can be good (eustress) or bad (distress). Eustress helps us cope with the demands of everyday life as it keeps us on our toes and drives us to perform. On the other hand, prolonged exposure or experience of stress causes distress that greatly affects one’s performance and effectiveness.

          Although there are different schools of thought regarding stress, one emerged as a key theory. It is Hans Selye’s general adaptation syndrome (GAS) belief that there are nonspecific reactions to stress. (Tamparo & Lindh, 2019, p.137) The figure below will describe the stages of such a theory.

                                                                      Figure 1.

       In the alarm stage, a signal is made and is making it known when there is perceived stress. The most obvious sign is pain. Next is the fight or flight stage when a person either escapes or confronts the stress. The third is exhaustion when fatigue becomes present. Lastly, the return-to-normal stage when the automatic nervous system’s craniosacral division kicks in and things get back to normal. (Tamparo & Lindh, 2019, p.139)

Stressed and then what

          The awareness of stress and its stages is imperative for future HOA because it will provide them with the understanding and the skill on how to deal with it, whether personally or professionally. The different stages of the adaptation to stress will allow the HOA to use appropriate therapeutic communication responses. For instance, when a client is in the alarm stage, it is vital to ask them where the pain is and let them describe it. The HOA’s ability when to provide detailed instructions or not, provision of privacy to clients when needed, maintaining eye contact, use of gentle and soft voice etc., are some of the concrete responses and skills that need to be learned and master which personally I deem very vital for my future career. To be more effective and efficient in adapting to stress, self-care is encouraged. Getting quality sleep is a sure-fire stressbuster, too.  One need not be guilty to have some time off and recharge. Therefore, self-awareness of what causes stress personally will help me deal with it as well as will be more emphatic towards the clients thereby attend to them efficiently.

 

                                                             References

Science Daily. (2020 November 23). Virtual reality helps measure vulnerability to stress. https://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2020/11/201119124637.htm

Tamparo, C. & Lindh, W. (2019) Therapeutic Communication for Health Care Professionals (4th Edition) [2.5.8484.0] Retrieved from http://texidium.com

 

 

Self-Care Tips from Pixar Characters

            Self-care is any activity that can be passive or active that fosters relaxation and rejuvenation of one's whole being. 

            The image above was shared by my mother through FB messenger. Unfortunately, I could not give proper credit to whoever created this wonderful poster as I could not find one when I did a reverse image search. To the person behind this, my thanks.

             Here are the self-care tips that the characters from the varied Pixar movies give us. 

            Live every moment. Every moment counts while we are still alive. Some prefer to dwell in the past and could either wallow in painful ones or excessively nostalgic of happy memories unable to create new ones. Some are excited or anxious to live in the future. It is vital to recognize the here and now and cherish what is. 

            Cook something yummy. Food nourishes the body. The act of cooking something from scratch is also something that gives joy to yourself and to others. Food also provides the opportunity to commune and talk.

            Sing a song. Music heals the soul as a song goes. Songs give lyrics and melody to the thoughts and feelings that one has. They make us relax, inspired, joyful, or just awaken sleeping emotions that we hold dear.

            Talk to a friend. Would not it be wonderful to just have someone listen without judgment to the many things that have happened in your life? That someone is not a stranger but a friend especially when that friend throws a banter or two and you end up laughing at the silly ones.

            Find joy in the small things. A smile, a kind gesture, a cone of ice cream... Such plain things when you begin to appreciate will mean a lot.

            Dance. Dance like no one is watching is a common adage for this self-care tip. When you dance, you meliorate your cardiovascular health, balance, strength, boosts cognitive performance, challenge your brain, boost mood, can be a social activity, and can be inclusive. (Lindberg, 2019)

            Go for a run. Runners always attest that this activity gives a physical and morale boost. One would start with 1 km then crave for another kilometer, and more. It makes your heart beat faster and releases hormones that help in your overall health.

            Take a drive. Suffice to say this tip gets its nickname as joy-riding. It is when you just jump into the car and drive aimlessly for a bit of scenery or grab a pizza at a nearby city. This takes out some of the mundane environment you have been in for too long.

            Write in your dream journal. My mother used to say that when you plan, half of the work is done. Well, there may be some truth in this. Writing your dreams in a journal or daydream journal allows your mind to recall and activate your creative side, too.

            Read a book. The smell and touch of book experts say help you remember what you have just read. The printed matter uses all your senses aside from your sense of sight. Of course, there is the advent of e-books but nothing compares to the experience of actual books. 

            Meditate. This may be the most low maintenance self-care tip because you do not need anything fancy. You can just find a quiet corner or nook and just sit and close your eyes. Be aware of your breathing and just think of happy thoughts to increase mindfulness. There is also some guided meditation that you can listen to as well.

            All these Pixar-inspired self-care tips are now for you to try. What is your favorite?

My Module Two Reflection on Barriers to Multicultural Therapeutic Communication

 

          Hearing and listening are two different terms although they both involve the auditory sense. The former is the use of the faculty, which is the ears while the latter involves comprehending by interpreting the sound and the nonverbal aspects of the message sent by the sender. Listening is the beginning of understanding and understanding is the result of effective communication.  However, what happens when the message gets distorted and causes chaos that perturbs both parties. To seek  and discuss the varied reasons for misunderstanding will be a stepping stone to build communication gaps.

Barriers to Multicultural Therapeutic Communication

          Barriers create ineffective communication patterns and structures. According to Luckmann (2000) in her book Transcultural Communication in Health Care, she identified eight therapeutic transcultural communication barriers.

                                                                Figure 1

          Lack of knowledge comes first in the barriers of communication as there is an adage that says, “little knowledge is dangerous”.  There are many anecdotes describing such barrier that come out funny yet most often than not offensive, too. Thus, it is important to get to know the client’s culture and heritage to be more culturally adept. Another barrier is fear and distrust. Clients coming from different countries bringing with them their respective cultures or talking and dressing in a particular way may cause discomfort and dislike on the end of the HOA. The color of the skin of the client may also pose as a barrier as some races are superior or inferior and the way to communicate with them may differ. Bias, prejudice, and ethnocentrism are considered as barriers as well because they form negative thought processes or beliefs that hinder communication. Stereotyping is another barrier which places a person in a box. For instance, a person with tattoo has incarceration experience or no sense of self-direction and the like. Health care rituals will also pose as a barrier, when they are different from that of the client. For example, having family members accompany them while seeing the medical physician. Language is an obvious barrier even if according to Lapakko (2007), verbal is only 7% while non-verbal is 93% in communication. Absence of a common language creates a barrier when one does not speak the same language or there is no point of understanding the message.  Finally, differences in perception and expectation will become a barrier as each person will have their individual interpretation of external stimuli such as sounds, visuals, etc., and anticipation of events that proceed.

          As the barriers were discussed and identified above, we have done the first step in addressing the hindrances. Lack of knowledge; fear and distrust; racism; bias, prejudice, and ethnocentrism; stereotyping; health care rituals; language; and differences in perception and expectations are barriers that can be resolved and eliminated if the HOA learns to have an open heart and mind to accept and to learn the ways in which they will be dispelled. 

REFERENCES

 

Lapakko, D. (2007). Communication is 93% Nonverbal: An Urban Legend Proliferates. Communication and Theater Association of Minnesota Journal, 34, 7-19.

Tamparo, C. & Lindh, W. (2019) Therapeutic Communication for Health Care Professionals (4th Edition) [2.5.8484.0] Retrieved from http://texidium.com

 

My Reflection on the Helping Interview

 

          Communication is vital in everyday life. For some, communication starts upon waking up by giving thanks to the Supreme Being and closing it as the day ends. In relationships, communication is considered as the fuel to keep it going. In fact, schools offer the opportunity to learn writing and speaking to communicate effectively. There are various courses offered and in this case, Conestoga College has offered a Communication in Health Care course for medical office practice students. The elements, concepts, and techniques on therapeutic communication have been discussed so far, and which this paper will describe as well as narrate selected parts that were reflected upon.  The helping interview comprises orientation, identification of the client’s problem, and resolution (Tamparo & Lindh, 2019, p.85-86) is vital to the students who are learning how to communicate in the medical setting.

The Helping Interview

          According to Tamparo and Lindh (2019),  the helping interview is a frequently- used communication tool in the medical setting that involves the health care professional and the person in need of medical intervention (p.85). The figure below will describe its components.

           Control factor, risk/trust, genuineness, sympathy and empathy, and sincerity are vital elements during orientation. It is in this phase that both will have their respective initial impressions of each other. Thus, it is necessary for the health care professional to provide a safe, comfortable space for the client as trust is being built. The next component is identifying the problem of the client. Knowing the roadblocks to communication allows the health care professional to avoid them. Moreover, skills in responding, sharing observations, knowing how to acknowledge feelings, clarifying and validating, and reflecting and paraphrasing are needed in this phase. It is also important to note that at this phase, levels of need are identified to address them. Tamparo and Lindh(2019) states that “recognizing that clients have different levels of need helps professionals to focus their attention correctly.”(p.93) Lastly, a resolution to the client’s need is the final phase of the helping interview by which addresses and answers the client’s questions that they had primarily and provides an explanation of what they are experiencing medically.

          The helping interview may present itself with only three components, yet its importance in communication in health care is very significant as various skills are needed to be acquired and developed by us students as we become health care professionals in the future. It is also relevant to highlight the need to properly and communicate with confidence and empathy towards the client. The word client itself was new as patient is usually the practice in identifying the person in need in the medical setting. The client as an identifier is more empowering and proactive. Knowing this key concept of communication in health care proves to be beneficial in every student’s future endeavors if they are being practiced and implemented.

REFERENCE

Tamparo, C. & Lindh, W. (2019)  Therapeutic Communication for Health Care Professionals (4th Edition) [2.5.8484.0] Retrieved from http://texidium.com