7 Things on living a long distance relationship

I have this 7 things list on my mind the past days...

 

1. Know that the space and miles in between should come to an end sooner or maybe later. Do not allow yourself to get used to being away from each other for quite too long a time.

 

2. If at your present moment being together at once is an impossibility (like JT and I waiting to follow suit Joe in Cnd), always have the courage and hope for your dream to realize one day- family being and living together.

 

3. There are times when you see complete families going to church, eating out, or travelling...and you smile and sigh at the same time wishing similar sight...Just hold on and enjoy what you are seeing. Then at your quiet time before you sleep, open your mobile fon or get your photo album to reminisce. A simple photo of us going out on a lakwatsa gives me the immediate boost.

 

4. Communicate. Cliche this may sound but there is indeed a big grain of truth. Skype, Viber, Zoom, postal services, telegram, etc... These are just few means to keep in touch. We are lucky enough that with the advent of internet or wifi or data plan communication becomes economical and immediate. Imagine 20 yrs ago one has to go to PT&T to call or wait for 2-3 weeks before you get hold of the mail sent to you!

 

5. Arguments or altercations are inevitable esp in this kind of scenario. Always strive to listen first and emphatize. The distance or longing for each other sometimes become the rootcause---unconsciously. Keep your cool and as much as possible iron things out. Then start and begin a new and learn.

 

6. Men sometimes may want to resolve things on their own (remember Popoy?) and us women and our nosy nose want to know every single detail. Well, we can just give them encouraging words and give them assurance instead of nagging.

 

7. Pray. Above everything else. Always ask God for the grace and fortitude. Let the joy and excitement of being together again be your impetus. In the meantime strive to live each moment well.

Cheer up! You are never alone.

Gospel for August 14, 2015 (Friday) Feast of St. Maximilian Kolbe

Mt 19:3-12

Some Pharisees approached him, and tested him, saying, "Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any cause whatever?"  He said in reply, "Have you not read that from the beginning the Creator 'made them male and female' and said, 'For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh'?  So they are no longer two, but one flesh.  Therefore, what God has joined together, no human being must separate."  They said to him, "Then why did Moses command that the man give the woman a bill of divorce and dismiss (her)?"  He said to them, "Because of the hardness of your hearts Moses allowed you to divorce your wives, but from the beginning it was not so.  I say to you, whoever divorces his wife (unless the marriage is unlawful) and marries another commits adultery."

(His) disciples said to him, "If that is the case of a man with his wife, it is better not to marry."  He answered,  "Not all can accept (this) word, but only those to whom that is granted.  Some are incapable of marriage because they were born so; some because they were made so by others; some because they have renounced marriage for the sake of the kingdom of heaven.  Whoever can accept this ought to accept it."

The Word in other words

This is how my professor at the seminary explained the sacramental bond of marriage to us.  He said:  A man, his mother, and his girlfriend are in a boat on a lake.  They have an accident.  The boat sinks and they are all in the water.  Only the knows how to swim.  He can only save one person at a time.  Whom does he save first?  In this instance, the bond between mother and child is stronger than the bond between boyfriend and girlfriend.  So he is morally obligated to save his mother first.

Imagine now a man, his mother, and his wife.  The same thing happens.  However, this time the man is morally obligated to save his wife first because the bond between the husband and wife is stronger than the bond between the mother and child.

This is why the Church admonished people not to take the sacrament of marriage lightly.  Choose your partner wisely and prayerfully.  My sociology professor in college used to tell us this quotation:  When going to war, pray twice.  When getting married, pray a million times.  Married life is not an easy path to take.  It involves a lot of patience, understanding, and sacrifice.  But the underlying force in all of these must be love.  Without love, no marriage stands a chance of succeeding.  A marriage blessed by God through the sacrament of marriage is a union that not only relies on the determination of the couple to make it succeed but also has the special grace from above which definitely makes it stronger.

Let us pray for all married couples that they may continue to love each other that they may always seek the counsel of God and ask for His blessing as they strive to be faithful to the vows they shared on their wedding day.

          -  Fr. Jose Luis "Chito" Lorenzo, SVD (Japan)